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May 21, 2013, 1:34pm

Post-Apocalyptic Forums :: Post-Apocalyptic Media :: Creative Writing :: When it is raining

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Topic: When it is raining (Read 247 times)

liber
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When it is raining
« Thread Started on Sept 2, 2011, 2:25pm »

Silence… I lost track of time.

I fell asleep and woke up cloaked in darkness and coldness of the nights of June. I fell asleep again and
already didn’t feel the work of my muscles that grew dumb. There was nothing around, just the box
of matches and burned candle in my hands. There was also the sack of some disgusting eatables –
that was all that I could bring from the surface when the peace of the world was broken by one of the
terrible curses. Yesterday I already couldn’t feel the fingers of my feet. They became so numb with the
cold that I couldn’t move them. Just a week ago, I tried to warm myself, to move. But now… who knows
for how long I will be able to suffer in this darkness. Probably I will go mad.

The very first day I was waiting for my wife and kids but nobody came, nobody knocked at the cover,
nobody cried. There was just silence. May be they found the shelter somewhere? I hoped, I was waiting
and I believed but I stayed alone and loneliness broke me. Box room of 4 square meters and the cellar
that I could build two years ago became my new home. And who could think that it would be so in such
circumstances.

For how long will I be able to suffer all this? For how long will be this food enough? For one moth? For
two? And why is it so? May be … Pah! What a nonsense?! Stop thinking about this… Suicide is not the
best solution. You still have forces and you are not alone. But what if you are alone? I was at the epoch
of the end of all the beginnings. I whisked the hoarfrost off my eyebrows. It was strange that they were
not the same as earlier. The skin of my hands got some strange dryness. It became difficult to open my
eyes... May be it was the ordinary tiredness or mental stress. But I sleep almost all the time. Probably I
am ill.

I haven’t heard anything during this time, even the mousses, may be I became deaf. No, I can hear my
own breathing. I stretched out my hand – as always there was nothing- the darkness cloaked my hand
and everything else in mystery.

For how long will it be so? I asked this question again and again. Firstly I did it in my minds, then I
whispered this question and during the last time I screamed. Did the humanity really destroy everything
so quickly? You know, may be I have phobia, but this thought makes me laugh. And I laugh again and
again, and plunge in darkness wrapping myself in two blankets. My lungs slowly take in the air and
make me live, when I don’t want this at all.

Strange taste of blood appeared in my mouth only this morning. Though, how can I know that this is the
morning? I even don’t know what time it is now. I haven’t had watches already for half of the year. All
this time I used my mobile phone that ran down after few tries to reach someone by phone… Seems like
everybody died out.

What if I am a paranoiac and nothing has happened? What if they all live their life and only I locked
myself up waiting for something. May be the world already endured terrible minutes and is running
its course again? Probably, no, I would hear this. Everything is so strange and more and more often I
have the willing to stand up, pull the handle of the basement’s cover and have a look at the new world.
Either I am scared or I stepped over the barrier when there is no willing to do anything. The only thing
that my forces still allow me to do is to write in my notes by the lead pencil but sometimes even this
task is too difficult for me.

I slept few more hours and my head started aching. Why? Probably, I have fever. The minutes were
dragging on and turning into hours. Finally I found the courage to get myself back to life. I started
rubbing my legs and noticed that they didn’t obey me. For how long had I been lying here? After one
hour passed or may be more, I managed to move my fingers. I sweated profusely and I understood that
I wasn’t ill at all. I just had to move a little, and it became easier to breath and I wanted to make my
last step, to perform my last dance, either dance of the life or dance of the death. Let’s see what Fate
prepared for me.

I heard like something small hit the cover of the basement, then again and again… And like a drumroll,
rain increased hitting the roof. That was the same rain that makes pupils, lovers, and just romantics feel
happy… I could hear that it speaks to me and wants to let me out of my dungeon, the dungeon that was
built by myself.

When it is raining,

People are dancing.

Sweet song of June

Is real God’s blessing.

People are dancing when it is raining, yes, it was so. And when it rains, I also want to dance. Probably
this helped me to make that step…

More efforts and the roof was opened giving the way to the cold drops of rain. It was afternoon
but the whole sky was cloaked with the dark shroud. I have never seen such sky. Those were not
thunderclouds. That was darkness. The wind stormed into the basement and almost tore my coat away.
The weather was surprisingly cold as well as rain that was beating at my face. Hardly hiding from the
head wind I reached the garage. Something made a great dent in the gates. I can’t imagine how much
strength it is necessary to have to bend such lead layers. Tile was totally torn off the roof of the house.
There were no windows but just the remains of the frames blacken with smoke. The fence sank to one
side in some places and in some places there was no fence at all. Columns of smoke were smoothly
rising to the sky dissolving somewhere in the very midst of the leaden clouds. What had happened with
the town? Thick wall of rain didn’t allow me to see everything around.

After I hardly opened the heavy metal door I came into the garage. Corroded sheds grated upon the
ears and I pulled a face. My bones and joints were aching, but I could reach my car. I need the key. I
rummaged in my pockets and fortunately found it there. Few kicks at the gates didn’t give any result.
And in fact, how would it be possible to knock out such a huge mass? Sheds were broken off, so, I
needed just a good strike.

The car friendly met its owner and the motor avidly roared with the first try. Concrete walls saved it.
And it gave me the forces. Looking at general damages, I could identify that the epicenter was not close.

Jesus! It is so cold… I turned on the heater and warm wind started to blow on my legs. The car was my
only friend now and it could save me from coldness. Gas was pressed on with all the strength and the
car knocked out the gates of the garage. I nearly rammed into the car that was standing nearby and was
pressed down by the fallen column. Wiper started to work intensively cleaning the windscreen from the
frozen drops.

I was driving hard along the narrow earth road, from time to time passing by fallen advertisement

hoardings and motionless cars on the road. Probably it is impossible to drive in the city now because
there are too many cars. Engine was roaring along the destroyed city. I rushed as quickly as it was
possible on the road with all the blockages and I could see just destroyed high blocks, smashed cars,
bent hoardings and dead bodies. There were so many of them, that I couldn’t fight my tears back. I
don’t know why, probably this was the feeling of despair.

Before all this, I spilt out with my wife and she took our children with her. I was sure that she was at
the summer house, because there was no other place where she could go… And I am fool, oh Jesus, I
am fool! Now I wish I had enough patrol for these 20 kilometers. Now I would die to see them and hug
them, to be close to them.

I would improve everything, if I had just one more chance. How could I make this mistake? Why did I
say that to her?

I stopped short knocking down some boxes, fell on the wheel with my face and cried again… I was crying
so only in my childhood. Is it really the end and it is impossible to change anything? I stopped crying,
raised my head and felt the salt on my leaps. There is a chance, and when you have it you must take it…
I confidently looked ahead where the fog was coming up and I could see destroyed high blocks. Probably
that was the epicenter. There was still one chance. And I believed, I didn’t hope, but believed, though
my mind understood that it was the end… The highway appeared to be overloaded with smashed cars,
some of them were turned over. I chose another road, passing by scrap piles. I made the most mileage
out of my car. Tires squeaked on the asphalt covered with dints and I gave a sigh. That was the place
where I was driving, that was the place where my wife and children must have been, that was the place
where my destiny must be defined…

I was wrapping into my coat even more just when the cold made itself felt.

I confidently made my way through the puddles. The summer house was almost safe. Just the fence and
the roof didn’t stand the wave. This was not that world that I saw before. Now here are the ruins of the
previous greatness. I could see only lonely houses, grey streets and scrap piles on the roads. I couldn’t
believe, but there was the glimmer of hope, frail, slight, glimmer of hope.

When it is raining,

The last time and freely

The wind starts its waving,

Destructive and avid.

Damn! The door was pressed by the beam that fell from the roof of the sun porch. I tried to pull up the
damp tree by the stiff fingers, but it was useless. One more try also finished with the failure. I swore
hardly and fell down on my knees heavily…

The wind was tearing my cloths; it didn’t spare my face and chilled my skin with its freezing drops. It
was very cold and I became chilled to the bone. Even wrapping into my coat I couldn’t save myself from
coldness.

Yes, I remember how two years ago I got to the house through the window when I didn’t have the keys,
now it will be even easier to get into. There were no any windows left and in some places frames also
disappeared. That is why it was easy to get into the house. Draught friendly met me straightening my

coat out.

She was lying on the bed, as always beautiful and inaccessible. Her combed hair was slightly hugging
the pillow. Children were lying close to her, one from the right side and another one from the left side.
They were hugging her strongly. Their eyes were closed. They slept. They had been sleeping already for
a long time and nothing could wake them up. They didn’t suffer. I was coming closer slowly, measuring
out every my pace in my temples. It is strange but I wasn’t captured by the feeling of panic or fear, I just
made one step after another. It seems like I knew that it would be so, and I was ready. And I didn’t have
any forces to cry, to scream because of pain, to fall - everything assumed its real features…

My eyes that lost hope glanced at the night table and my fingers confidently took the vial. There was the
inscription: “Girin – rat poison”. Everything became clear. And I easily discovered that I am really alone.

I looked at those whom I loved most of all in this world once again. They were the same but their faces
became pale and in some places skin got small wounds. May be they are lucky and I should also join
them? My hands took that cherished vial again, I quickly counted out four pills - this will be enough…

No, it cannot be so simple. There must be some other decision. .. I can’t finish my life in such a way,
because it is so beautiful. And I immersed into memories. I recollected my child fears… I was afraid of
height and uncertainty, that’s right, it was really so.

I rushed cleaving the wall of the rain. Probably I got mad, or may be I just couldn’t live any more; there
was no any forces…

I jumped into the car, hugging my dear metal, and said something hoarsely. I tried to say something
like “So what my buddy, let’s make our last journey”. Speeding from the roadside the car rushed to
meet the wind, swallowing avidly its freezing flows. I knew that there was the steep ahead and the
bridge which building wasn’t finished, and I smiled. This smile seemed somehow strange for me…

I already feel it, I feel how it is calling me. I see its vague image and magnificent heights meeting me.

World, you were so wonderful… Life, I am grateful to you for being mine… Dream, thank you for staying
in my heart!

Yes, here is the freedom. Just 30 meters. This is the flight that I was waiting for… This is the flight that
will give me the happiness…

I let the wheel off.

When it is raining,

The hope is flaming.

When the rain stops,

The whole world drops.

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MEGATØN
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Re: When it is raining
« Reply #1 on Sept 2, 2011, 10:37pm »

That was really good. Was it written in English or translated from an original in some other language?

Either way, I liked it.

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